Hi. My name is Heather. And I am an energy healer.
I debated about whether or not to tell my story, as I had mixed messages from my therapy teacher who was from the school of keeping your personal life out of your practice, and yet conflicted with many people who have told me that my story would inspire others. For years, telling my story would also mean I would suffer the following weeks with extreme anxiety and panic attacks, just from bringing the memories back to the surface. I also had a fear of how people would see me…tainted, possibly mentally unstable or lying, etc… Plus I noticed that once I told some people, they refused to keep eye contact with me and often never spoke to me again. Some people I felt would be traumatized just hearing the details. And I have also been worried that some people would look at me as one who is trying to get sympathy, which I loathed!
I didn’t want it to isolate me from the world, but yet, I had a hard time being silent once I found healing through the emotion code that offered drastic relief from the effects of trauma. I knew I couldn’t keep it to myself. I had to have experienced this for SOMETHING, bigger than me.
My search for answers to healing the body and mind began as a young girl, dealing with a dysfunctional family and a mom who suffered from mental illness and paranoia. After a divorce, When I was 2, she took me out of state and hid me from my Dad because she was convinced he was abusing me. She remarried, and my stepfather didn’t know how to handle her emotional outbursts and suicidal ideation. He took out his frustrations in rage and anger. They went through a difficult marriage in which they tried to heal by visiting a very spiritually inspired family therapist for a few years. This man became my greatest mentor. His vision inspired me to want to heal others and help them find peace. But my parents were unyielding to his concepts and after a nasty divorce, my mom took my siblings and me to Utah and moved in with my grandma. She was bitter towards my goals, love of musical theater, and relationships. So the next years found me moving to various homes of friends and relatives, trying to cope, trying to find my safe place.
My safe place and first education:
I lived with my uncle and aunt after high school, who were amazing mentors and teachers of the law of attraction, abundant living, and living a natural holistic lifestyle. They had 11 kids and taught them all to enjoy life and each other, and live in true positive vibration and create affluence. My uncle was the top distributor in the Japanese health research and development distributorship company called Nikken and I saw first hand how his influence and this company changed the lives of people who had given up hope. It was my first real glimpse of energy healing. The company had a program called Silver Training that was later called Humans Being More Training, that taught the power of the mind to defy odds with one’s belief and the power of love and forgiveness. We used physical lessons of the use of energy and synergy in a group setting and created vision boards we called life cycle plans for one’s life.
It was astounding to learn how much power one could potentially have over their own life, given the right tools and environment. At night, my Uncle would read books to the family as we all lied around, of scripture as well as positive thinking. I got to meet authors such as Norman Vincent Peale, Earl Nightingale, Napolean Hill, Brian Tracy, and Jim Rohn. This was always followed by family prayer and hugs for each person present. My uncle and Aunt’s peaceful attitude and incredibly loving and confident lifestyle gave me a glimpse of the kind of future I wanted. I began to study on my own and listen to more positive teachers and scripture scholars. The vision they offered me gave me hope and the resilience I needed for my next challenges.
I entered HELL
My next experience wasn’t so happy. I learned the true meaning of trauma when “family friend”, a woman who had taken my sister in to save her from my mother and a life of bad influences, also took it upon herself to “rescue me” from my fiance who had relapsed on drugs. I came for a “visit” to her home in the woods but she abducted me and refused to let me go. She destroyed my ties with all my family and burned, dumped, or sold everything I had.
In her delusions that I was being “punished” for my sins she abused me and tried to “purify me” with physical and emotional torture, and her religious ideation. She began having thoughts that I deserved her fear and was hiding some horrible sick desires and tried to beat me into admitting to committing sins. She was eventually convinced I was possessed, and come to destroy her family. She instructed her children to be “in charge” of watching and punishing me. I was not allowed to go to the bathroom unattended, sit on a chair, sleep on a bed except for certain periods of surveillance. I couldn’t eat normal food at my own will or drink water unless it was approved. I was fed on the floor like a dog, Margarine 4-5 sugar sandwiches or 4 packages of Ramen with a cup of margarine, and told I had to finish it all to prove I was “normal” and If I threw up …..I was hit until I drank the puke.
The weird thing was, There were times where she would think I was changing and suddenly she would be sweet and dote over me about a fresh start, and try to uplift me and tell me of how wonderful my future could be. The whiplash of the emotional roller coaster brainwashed me into doing anything to please her, and keep her happy with me, including pretending I was mentally ill in public, sabotaging the people she didn’t like, or following her orders to humiliate myself with a pretended psychological breakdown in front of visitors. The abuse left me scarred with chipped teeth, a broken nose so crushed I had to have surgery to be able to breathe again, partially blinded in one eye, and a deformed ear.
So how did I get out?
I escaped after 2 and a half years Right after September 11th, when the family was preoccupied with the world events, and momentarily “forgot” to lock me in the bathroom…as was the traditional way to ignore me. I had been stashing stuff in a bag in the garage and I seized the moment. I ran to a nearby hotel and begged to use the phone to locate my father who I knew would take me in and clean her rooms in exchange for a room that night. My father took me in and I finally got to know him. He helped me go through school at UVSC, where I met my best friend and husband and began my real life.
The trauma left me with severe PTSD. Just thinking about memories would put me in a trance, and driving was not safe, as I would run red lights or shift the car inappropriately while on the freeway! I developed an unhealthy fear of her and was convinced that she had some mystical power to destroy me if I ever told anyone and I even reconnected to prove my loyalty. I first wrote my feelings in faint pencil in a journal so it could be erased, and hid it under my mattress…as though she might find it. My mind was fragmented.
After having my first child, I finally told my Bishop and begged God to release me from my fear and inner turmoil. In my search for answers, I decided to turn to psychology and therapy. It woke me out of my stupor and helped me feel more alive again. I went to UVSC, Argosy University and again to UVU to study psychology.
I loved learning about the brain and behavior and felt alive as I feasted over lectures, books, and seminars! I had 6 scattered years of formal study, between having my 6 babies, and never stopped buying books and studying psychology on my own personal time. I interned as a parent-teen mediator for a high school and taught parents with the Strengthening Families Program run by UVU.
For my own help and 6 therapists later, I had developed some understanding of theories, a few possible resolutions, but symptoms of PTSD, depression, and anxiety were still bubbling up under the surface. Triggers still could take me under and knock me over unexpectedly. And I knew I needed something more.
The emotion code was my answer, but I was reluctant:
I discovered The Emotion Code in 2008 after experiencing a panic attack (as a result of PTSD) when my daughter cut herself while company was over. I called my cousin who had learned the E/C and in a matter of seconds she was able to release the panic and I never again had trouble handling cuts and painful accidents from my kids. I was surprised at how it easily erased some of my symptoms.
I knew I was meant to learn this method, but overcome by self-doubt, I shelved the book as well as my own progress. During the next few years, I went to school to continue my degree in psychology and finished my coursework for substance abuse counseling. I studied positive psychology and became obsessed with observing the lives of others who have overcome insurmountable obstacles and are now mentors and coaches who inspire and uplift. I had studied the law of attraction as well but felt that there were holes that didn’t fit, and wondered what it was that made it feel incomplete to me.
When I was pregnant with my 5th girl I had a therapist who used EMDR to help me with continued anxiety and panic attacks. It brought me back to the time when I used the emotion code. EMDR was beneficial, but it had no way of pinpointing specific details the way the E/C had and didn’t have the same level of accuracy. Besides that, I didn’t want to remember the pain, I didn’t want to have to talk about it. My desire for a better way brought me back to pulling the book out and trying to remove some things myself.
I continued to study books and authors works who changed my life and helped me see more and more into why we suffer and how to overcome. I found comfort in Studying the gospel of Jesus Christ and building a relationship with my savior. I knew that somehow he was guiding me to the sources that could heal me, and help me heal others. I loved James Ferrell and the Arbinger Institute, and I found Wayne Dyer and Louise Hay, but when I found Carol Tuttle, and her book, Remembering Wholeness, the pieces of the law of attraction came together including how it all fits in with my beliefs on Jesus Christ and his atonement for the world. Suddenly it gave me “permission” to discover other forms of energy healing such as EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), rapid eye technology and reiki.
I decided to immerse myself in the research of the law of attraction, healing, and positive thinking. I realized my life was heading into the path I always knew was going to be a reality. And then the bolt of lightning hit me…I realized that feeling I had felt 10 years previously was pushed aside, and I had known my life calling but because of my own self-doubt, I had shelved it.
I embraced my purpose and finally healed my life:
The Emotion Code book was back off the shelf, and after some healing my own Emotion code therapists, I had the confidence to reopen my dream of healing others and take charge of my reality. The symptoms that had held me back were literally gone. My Life didn’t even look the same. Before, my husband and I had struggled financially and now had more than tripled our income and had gone from a 2 bedroom college dorm with 6 kids to a 6 bedroom dream home. We realized where our struggles had come from and how to manifest a more abundant life through the law of attraction. Physical symptoms and emotional symptoms were changed in an instant to healing. And I started to help others.
I began to help others clear away their symptoms and issues and was amazed at how fast it worked. I also realized how my intuition was increasing and my ability to sense others empathically and energetically was getting stronger. My resolve became my passion and I knew this was my calling.
I am convinced Life is meant to be full of health, happiness, and vitality. I believe that we are children of God and he sent us here to experience and overcome our trials, not merely suffer through them. And I also believe that he has provided some excellent resources for healing. He wants us to uplift others, and to be the best we can be, so we can, in turn, be the inspiration to someone else’s challenge. I believe in the guidance and assistance of angelic help, and that we may have been given challenges that enable us to also be “earthly angels” to others.